It’s been so long since I’ve talked to someone in real life, my father hasn’t spoken to me in three weeks and I haven’t left the apartment in two. I’m losing my mind and I can’t do a thing about it. I play guitar, read, write, and listen to music endlessly until my father gets home and I have to be quiet. It’s getting harder and harder to keep myself numb. Now that everyone hates me, would I be missed if I just disappeared?
»In response to this, that is a stupid question and will always be one. No matter who you are. Although some stand blind in the world that we live in, some see beyond. They can see suffering and pain in the lives that they DONT have to feel for and DO. A lot in the world is inevitable, but to go along with that, there is also a component in this galaxy that nearly anything is possible within scientific standards. Humanity may be cruel and unkind for the most part. But does sheer mass trump to potency of a heartfelt individual? Or many individuals for that matter…
Point being that of course people would miss you. Would they get over your death? Yes, time seems to heal a lot if you let it. But it will scar, there would always be a scar. For the pondering of the people around longing to of saved a life and to tear themselves apart for the ignorance of a brother. I say brother because humans are nothing but. We strive to be different, yet how far can we achieve that in a mass? No matter our colour, race, gender, chemical balances, WE ARE ALL THE SAME. Fighting to survive, moving up in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Socialization takes a toll and i guess if you were just starving you wouldnt be so conflicted in a way since you would be too preoccupied with the primal survival. But furtunately(and unfortunately) you have a home and all so you are conflicted socially and acceptance wise. A pity since so many share this feeling with you. Honestly, nobody is normal and this is the burden of being human. The grace to feel ecstasy and utter dilapidation of an emotional state. As the most “superior” beings on the planet, we have the mental tools to overcome what hinders us. Although at the same time, we have the power to render our own selves hopeless and lonely.
Lonliness is a disease that affects us all. But I guess at the end of the day, if you disappear, the dead have it easy. But the living are left in your wake. Although it’s such a shame when some have to die in order for some to see the error of our ways towards others….
That is all :) <3